Family Life · Home Life

Messy House and Friendship

If your friend drops by and you’re not immediately in a panic about the state of your house I think you’ve got a good friend standing in front of you!

Toddler mess around our impromptu photo shoot

I used to want my house to look like a magazine all the time.  Actually, I thought that’s how my house was supposed to look!

I like a clean, neat and clutter free environment.  It is the most comfortable atmosphere for me and allows me the best creative space.  But life happens and I have a toddler!  So that means that my house is not always perfect…obviously!

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The ‘stuff’ corner!
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Zeke’s room tidied up, ahh, joy!

At least once a week (usually) my house is cleaned topped to bottom and I don’t have a lot of clutter sitting around but there are always spots.  The desk that sits with a pile of papers I need to go through.  The corner that has returns that need to be taken back.  The chest that has clothes that need to be put away.  You get the picture.  I try to get to these by Friday.  My goal is always a clean house for the weekend so I can truly rest and have family time on Saturday and Sunday.  I like this goal but I am also flexible with it!  Sometimes things just don’t get done.  The week is too full and there are just things that need to get done on Saturday.  Or sometimes I just have to make peace with the fact that I can’t get it all done and something else (someone else) is more important.

Reading the paper surrounded by mess!

Over the years I have been able to relax those perfectionist tendencies I feel over my house.  I fight the notion that my house is a reflection of who I am or the fear that someone may judge me if my house isn’t perfect.  My husband has helped me a lot in this area.  I’ve said many times that he doesn’t know how to be embarrassed!  I love his attitude and he has helped me say ‘who cares’ a bit more!

People are more important than stuff.  People are also more important than tasks.

I want my home to be a place of hospitality, love, comfort and joy.  For me, part of that is keeping a clean(ish) home.  But more importantly it’s about having people in my home and connecting with them on a deeper level.

So, if I have someone over and my house isn’t perfect it reminds me that I have a good friend.  That we have gotten past the outer appearances and dug deeper into loving each other in real life.  Because real life is far from clean.  No one lives in a clean house all the time, especially if you have children.  And your friend knows that because she has a home too!

He loves this little bear!

I challenge you this week to be a bit more vulnerable with your friends this week.  Let them see a not so perfect side of you!  Let them see your house messy, or your hair undone, or your face without makeup!

What area of your life do try to keep looking perfect?

Where do you find it hard to be vulnerable?

Do you like your house clean and neat?  Have you ever struggled with wanting your house to be perfect?


2 thoughts on “Messy House and Friendship

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